i am a dreamer. i dream of open skies and blazing fires. i dream of colors and melodies and freedom. i dream of peace and happiness and eternal summer days. i dream of a world where every child has a home.
i love writing and this is a place where i hope to be able to share my thoughts on life, love and motherhood. i am an advocate for orphans and especially pray for children with special needs who don’t have families. i love Jesus, adoption, music, art, and traveling. i love my husband and my daughters, and am trying to be the best wife and mother possible. some days are more successful than others. more often than not, i feel like a failure, but i am trying to let go of my perfectionism and see beauty in the brokenness.
i grew up in a christian commune, the bruderhof, and had a relatively stress-free childhood. i have seven siblings and we lived with 350 other people in very close proximity. growing up on a farm with no TV, radio, or really anything outside of the small village-like setting taught me a lot. i learned about simple living and sacrificial love. i developed a love for nature, creativity, and community. we wore long skirts and head-coverings and lived in a quiet, modest, safe utopia. i left the community when i was 20, and have never felt quite so alone in my entire life. completely unprepared for this abrupt transition, it was like i had been thrown into a strange, new world that i had no context for. it was scary and overwhelming. i had some difficult years of wandering and feeling lost, but during that time i also experienced some of the most wonderful people and places in the world. over the past 9 years, i have lived in many different places; england, germany, ireland, romania, philadelphia, los angeles, kenya, and uganda. finally, in august of 2006 i traveled across the country from california (in an RV as a nanny) and settled down in charlotte.
i have learned a lot and continue to grow with each passing year. i have messed up a lot and received more grace than i deserve. but i am thankful for everyone who has been there for me along the way. it’s been quite a ride, and God has been faithful and unwavering. His strong hand has been my guide. His love has carried me through.